[tmtranscripts] Nebadonia 7.11.05

[JERRY LANE]

Dear Folks,    Here is a wonderful lesson from Mother Spirit on how we 
sometimes get in our own way with our thinking and concepts, and how to get 
out of this situation.  I want to thank one of the "students" who works so 
hard and patiently with the transcribing, for me to edit.  His help has been 
invaluable lately in getting this word out to you.  Enjoy.  Jerry - 
Nytrayn at msn.com

Nebadonia 7.11.05

Marin TM Group

Dear Mother Spirit and Michael,  Gladly we embrace Your suggestions - we 
feel our hearts beating, we open our minds; and then we forget ourselves.  
We relinquish our hearts and minds and turn them over to You.  Come be with 
us and talk to us.  Tell us of these wonders - the kinds of beings we are.  
Inspire us to go out and share these wonders with our brothers and sisters, 
some so greatly in need.  Amen.

Nebadonia:  My beloved children, this is your Mother.  Just relax awhile and 
drift along on Me.  This is Me all around you, like a warm buoyant sea, like 
the river of life pouring from our Father.

I too am a river, a river of spirit pouring from the Infinite Spirit.  You 
rightly know Me as the Holy Spirit, for all the rivers from Deity form a 
great living circle flowing back to Them.  And so We have been helping you 
feel for the current, the trend of life toward ever greater life, the moment 
to moment fulfillment of potential creating genuine abilities, the capacity 
for more potential.

We have often mentioned spiritual abilities, and We have encouraged you to 
grow in these.   But what precisely is an ability?  Ponder this for a few 
moments and ask yourselves: What is this possession you can acquire, one 
that will stand you in good stead not only the rest of your lives here, but 
in all the days to come, beyond?  What is the relationship between ability 
and potential?  Are they nearly two phases of the same thing?  If something 
is potential, that means it is not yet here and now, but it is a real 
possibility.  It can happen sometime in the future.  So you can think of an 
ability as your own personal power to make it happen.  As you grow in your 
abilities, it means you are adding something to your power that didn’t exist 
yesterday.  You’ve encountered something new and you have learned how to do 
it.  You’ve reflected on it and made it your very own, and now that you have 
it, you are larger, more things are possible for you up there in the future.

You even have an ideal, what you call a Renaissance Man, someone who has a 
love and a curiosity extending into many different fields of human endeavor, 
someone who delights in expanding his or her abilities and so can reap an 
immediate reward seeing their future opening up.  Here the more you do the 
more you are able to do.

Think of how this applies to the distinction We have been encouraging you to 
perceive between those aspects of your reality which are continuing day to 
day, and that part of reality that is alive and being created anew each 
moment.  Ask yourself, with respect to these two phases of reality, what is 
strictly cause and effect and proceeding from antecedents, and what seems to 
be bubbling up fresh this moment, making this moment unique.

You can grow in your abilities to handle either of these phases of your 
human reality, for learning how to deal with that which has been continuing 
all your life is also a true ideal and in its own way bottomless.  But think 
if you develop an ever more acute sense of what is new in each moment - this 
continuous creation of God’s that you can recognize as: this moment has 
never happened before - and if you were to welcome this which is new, 
perhaps even strange, would you not then be exercising and growing your 
abilities?  Doesn’t this make sense, My children?

Think of someone you know who appears to be very comfortable in new 
situations, who actually looks forward to them and, having done this awhile, 
has truly earned his or her own self-confidence.  This is someone who 
delights in the challenge of what may be momentarily uncertain.  They know 
that in every new situation there is something more to learn, a greater 
ability to acquire, and then a larger, more diverse future in store.  
Whereas all of this - so delightful and invigorating - could and does appear 
as a kind of terror to individuals who are clinging desperately to an 
illusion of nothing changing.

We have used the illustration before this would be like trying to drive 
through life looking in the rearview mirror of the past, not realizing that, 
since the river of time is from the past into the future, they’ve got 
themselves turned around.  They’re being swept inexorably forward, but 
oriented backwards, willy-nilly, and now the front wheels are behind them 
and they wonder why it’s so hard to maintain a straight course, or any 
course at all.

We give you these examples so you can have a quality of recognition of what 
We are alluding to.  To continue Our example of driving a car; as you know, 
the faster you go the more your attention has to be well down the road, out 
beyond the edge of your stopping distance, for all the unexpected things 
that do come up in front of you.  In this analogy, the best driver is 
totally unselfconscious.  The vehicle feels like a part of him.  He knows 
where everything is and is very well self-trained, so there seems to be no 
intermediary between his intention and what he does mentally and physically 
to affect it.

This frees up his attention so it can be not only well down the road to 
where he’s headed, but there is enough for a glance in the rearview mirror 
of the past from time to time, and then even enough left over to look around 
and enjoy the going, appreciate the new countryside or city he’s being a 
part of.  This is the best way to grow your abilities – unselfconsciously - 
with one hundred percent commitment to what it is you are doing - work or 
play, alone or with a group of your friends or co-workers.

You have an odd saying that the devil is in the details.  But I’m just 
teasing of course.  I think that referred to some legal shenanigans, the 
fine lines at the bottom of the page to catch the unwary.  I’m really 
speaking about the delight in the details, the infinity of God’s creation 
that stands out when you are no longer wasting so much attention trying to 
perceive yourself perceiving life.

You are a child of God, and you can know this profoundly, deeply inside 
yourself.  This is His possibly – He created as your potential - the 
wonderful ability to know you are faith son or daughter of God.  You don’t 
have to try to see God in a flower.  Just see the flower.  The more you see 
that flower, the more you appreciate its uniqueness in its moment to moment 
existence there in front of you, the more you are with Us and with your 
Father.  For this too is an ability.

Do you remember one lesson where I suggested that with a bit of detachment 
you can sense the qualitative changes in your perceived reality?  This takes 
some real tenacious attention to notice and accept the feedback from reality 
- by way of your perceptions, to tell if you are more or less getting it 
right.  Wonder about this.  Wonder: Well then, how can I tell if I am 
growing in my abilities?  How can I tell if I’m getting too self-absorbed?  
How can I tell if my world and the people within it I love so well - how can 
I tell if they are growing or fading away?

Let that wonder and curiosity go deep within you, My children.  Then carry 
it forward to the next meeting with your activities, or with others.  This 
wonder is another way of opening yourself.  It is part of your attitude - 
your willingness and, here comes that word again, your ability to relate 
with all that is not you.  Can you feel this wonder and this curiosity 
bubbling up inside of you?  Can you see that as you aim towards perfection, 
as you seek to follow our Father’s commandment - Be perfect - this wonder 
and this willingness to share your life leads you toward being the 
fountainhead of the stream of your own life, a distinct and growing stream 
in the Father’s greater river?

This is what We mean by ability.  Now you recognize it and know how you 
nurture and grow it until you too are filled with delight, facing the 
unknown self-confident in all it has to teach you.

If you have any questions or comments this evening, let’s have a look at 
them.

Student:  Mother, I was wondering what You and Father meant by – home, or 
home base - as something within me.

Nebadonia:  Yes, My son, this was actually just a name Welmek, your elder 
brother and teacher, gave for an inner experience or awareness you can have. 
  You achieve a level of mind, or a kind of mentality where you are open to 
receiving messages from your own personal Celestial Teacher.  If you mean it 
generally, you experience yourself in a kind of pregnant potential, where 
you are able to relax and un-focus your present, ongoing concerns and, while 
enjoying this cessation of so many busy things, you feel you are at a point 
of departure.  Everything is still and peaceful within, and yet you sense 
this is a dynamic point of origin.  This is where everything begins, and so 
there is power here.  Here is all that real potential We talked about.

Here you can rest and regain your depleted energies, physical and mental and 
spiritual.  Here you can visit with your soul, and say, Thank You, Father - 
a hundred times over, when the dear folks you have known come up for review. 
  You have an inkling you are getting closer to Deity here, whose absolute 
power is utterly peaceful and loving.  And so you can call it home base.  
You are home - back where it all started, and starts again.  Does this 
answer your question, My son?

Student:  Part of it.  I’m wondering is this a place to get to, or to go to, 
or to come from, or just be with?

Nebadonia:  At different times, all of the above; truly.  On wonderfully 
serendipitous occasions, it just happens.  Other times you feel a profound 
need for touching this base.  Yet you bring this about by relinquishing and 
giving up desire.  You have this overwhelming need to get to some place 
within yourself, and yet you actually do so by relinquishing desire, even 
curiosity, and just delight in existing, reassuring yourself that you are.  
You let go everything you are capable of letting go, and yet you still are.

Experiencing this is sometimes what you need most of all to quiet all those 
fluttering anxieties, or those profound doubts, or that needless worry as if 
otherwise you might cease to exist.  You summon the courage to let all of 
this go and give yourself back to Us and our Father.  Then glorious of all 
surprises, you find yourself back at the beginning where you can rest.

So how home base appears to you, and how to get to it, or find it, or let it 
be, depends where you are in relationship to it.  After all, it is home 
base.  Does this make sense, My son?

Student:  Yes, but the big question is: Where would I find mine?  Or do I 
have one?  Because I’m not sure I even have one.  Is this where I would meet 
You and Michael, or the Heavenly Father within me?

Nebadonia:  Let Me assure you, you definitely do have one.  It is where you 
actually exist.  But it is deep and it is often layered over with much 
mental activity, especially those kinds I mentioned of worry or anxiety or 
doubt.  But this is the goal of your practice of stillness.  So it’s a 
deepening experience, My son, something that can be felt even while your 
mind still has its random thoughts.  This experience does not mean an 
absence of mental activity.

It’s a final reassurance of you to yourself that you not only exist, but 
this existence of yours is very profound, very absolute, and very secure.  
This is such a self-sufficiency, you don’t need to feel Us, or God as 
something apart from you.  We’re actually a part of you here.  Our only wish 
is that you be positive of your own absolute existence.  Has this helped you 
to focus in?

Student:  Yes, Mother, it does quite a bit.  Ah, it looks like a great place 
to be, a great place to access every now and then, or a great place to come 
from.  Thank You.

Nebadonia:  Again, My son, it’s all of the above.  It’s a kind of ideal 
insofar as it keeps modulating towards greater power and greater potential.  
In terms of stillness, you feel ever more empty and yet so tingling-ly 
alive, if you will.  In terms of mind, you know a  peacefulness, though 
random thoughts may come and go.  And in your heart, in your feelings, is 
the calm self-assurance that so often leads right over into worship, into 
feelings of thankfulness.  It’s something worth achieving, which means you 
kind-of aim for it, you remember it, then relax and relinquish all your 
striving.   Let it overtake and come upon you.  And be in My love.

Student:  Thank You again, Mother.

Student:  Yes, Mother, I wish to thank You for Your statement tonight about 
not looking for God in the flower but seeing the flower for what it is.  
That’s really a profound statement because the flower is God, and if you 
come from this place of home base, that’s all you see.  You don’t have to 
look for God, because it already is.   I think I’ll meditate on that 
tonight, and I thank You for that.

Over the past couple of days, with the idea of change, of going with the 
change, and then the book I’ve been reading called, “Tomorrow’s God” - that 
life is change, change is life…what I’ve been feeling lately is being aware 
of peoples’ inability to change, such as those around me, and for me it’s 
quite agonizing because it doesn’t seem natural and I have a hard time with 
it, because I feel it so deeply.  If You have any comments about that, how 
to help people who have no ability to change, or to ask for change, or to be 
motivated to change - because for some change is quite scary.  As You said, 
change into what?  Letting go of ones identification into what?

Nebadonia:  First let Me address your understanding of seeing the flower.  
You have a deep insight as to how the more you can feel yourself to be 
living at home base and coming from that self-assurance, the more you are 
able to set aside concepts of God.  Concepts are human mental 
comprehension’s and there is a profound humility in realizing that your 
concepts of God, while well-meant and useful, are so much less than the 
flower, which is His creation.

This applies very directly to those individuals who feel at heart very 
insecure.  They’re caught in a vicious cycle of hanging onto themselves so 
tightly, they are shutting out this wondrous creativity that could take them 
out of themselves and give them an experience of such joy in the Other - all 
the other creations of God.  This is why, if you would be a spiritual 
teacher, My son, try to follow Our example and the example of Michael when 
He was on Urantia, living His life as Jesus.

Reflect back to people their absolute existence.  Help them reassure 
themselves that they are, in this profound way, a child of God.  Help them 
get over the illusion that they alone are keeping themselves going.  Think 
of all the ways We have tried to reassure you of this.  This is the only way 
to get them to let go of themselves so tightly and have these experiences of 
being overwhelmed with the sheer beauty and magnitude of God’s creation, so 
that they can lose themselves, and then have the following, even more 
delightful experience of popping up again.  They can realize this letting go 
of themselves into Gods’ creation is not annihilation, but growth.  But when 
someone is out floating in this huge sea of God, clinging desperately to a 
little life buoy of just concepts of themselves, what they need more than 
anything else is a strong hand reaching out to them to help them stay 
afloat.

Which means you must see them Our way.  You must see their absolute being in 
order to reflect it back to them.  So always perceive, My son, how they are 
- completely independently of how they may see themselves.  See them in 
their complete body and mind and spirit and soul, and you will have 
something to give them.  Does this help you?

Student:  Yes, it does.  Yes, it does. Two thoughts came to mind when You 
were speaking.  One is that for those who still have the inability to 
change, and are so full of fear of changing; that change still comes to 
them.  Not necessarily in the way they desire.  And secondly, the thought 
that to see each person as You say, actually changes the relationship that I 
have with these people.  I personally have to let go of the past 
relationships I’ve had with these people - in the past - in order to reflect 
this absolute reality.

Nebadonia:  Now you have it.  Just be aware of your own comparisons, My son.

Student:  Yes!  Was that the agony I was feeling - was my own comparisons, 
my own evaluations, so to speak; or was it something deeper?

Nebadonia:  I think that was largely it.  You have to suspend your own ideas 
of the ability or the inability to change - in others, and just see them as 
God’s flowers.  It may help to do this by realizing for some theologian, 
say, who has spent his or her life studying God and doing their best to 
worship, but having a whole lifetime of thousands of concepts of God 
swirling in their minds, getting in the way; to suspend all that just to see 
a flower might appear to them absurd.  But consider the courage it takes to 
realize that all those concepts are so much less than the living reality in 
front of you, and within you.

There is certainly nothing wrong with concepts – recognized as such.  
They’re the tools in your mind’s toolbox of hard-earned understanding, 
expressed in words.  You needn’t give anything up.  All those concepts can 
still co-exist.  But this orientation is what I was pointing to when I 
suggested you gain the ability to tell when that flower is growing ever more 
real and unfathomable in your perception.  Go that way.  And if this can 
happen with a flower, think what can happen with another person.  So yes, My 
son, I think you hit it right on the mark when you very much understood My 
meaning.  You realized how much you may have to set aside to let this person 
expand enormously in your perception.

Student:  But it appears quite daunting.  As You said that, I felt this 
constriction in my gut; but I know this will pass.  I always wonder what it 
would be like to let go of all my beliefs and concepts, and see what 
appears.  Maybe that’s home base.

Nebadonia:  Well, is this not the very change you were wishing – they - were 
able to accomplish?

Student:  Yes…yes.  And maybe this feeling of agony is tinged with 
compassion and desire for them to experience life as the infinite potential 
that is - within them, that God gives them.  Thank You.

Nebadonia:  You’re welcome, My son.  Enjoy being in My love.

Student:  Dear Nebadonia, I’d like to thank You for Your part yesterday in 
my little awaking or epiphany coming back from Muir Woods.  I understood a 
little bit better how our jobs on the Mansion Worlds won’t necessarily be 
easier, and that while we may feel we are waiting here for something to 
happen on earth, if we are very much being with a plan of our Divine Guide 
to prepare us for a better future, or a better understanding of the Mansion 
Worlds, or just a better understanding of, say, that poor English soldier 
who died of heat prostration back in the Revolutionary War, and may wind up 
on the Mansion Worlds wondering why he died in vain…  And maybe somebody 
like myself who now understands compassion a little better, from what I’ve 
received, may be able to help that person.

So I felt the release of this hunger-tension for Paradise Perfection.  Now I 
feel grateful for the cognition, or that better understanding of the ages of 
the universe that I received.  Thank You, and I would appreciate any further 
comments on that.

Nebadonia:  Yes, My son, it seems you are taking to heart what I suggested 
not too long ago, about not letting your ambition - your hunger for 
perfection - get in the way of receiving it.  You go forward on two feet, 
alternating your left and your right, so We offer these parallel examples of 
what We mean by completion and perfection.  They are so different in a 
spiritual way, they are not self-contradictory.

You are complete moment to moment.  All the past, as complex and profound as 
you can think of it - in terms of karma, cause and effect; plus all the 
uniqueness of all those individual days - everything lead to now, and is 
completed in now.  Because now there is something else happening We’ve 
called God’s continuous creation.  It’s kind-of like the icing on a cake.  
God takes all that has been, without losing a whit of it all, and adds to 
it.  And so each moment is complete in its uniqueness; it is fulfilled; it 
is like no other.  And yet here comes another moment, another healthy dollop 
of Gods’ creativity, and it’s all changed.  There’s something growing here.  
There’s even a direction, a spiritual direction to this growth.

You are very wise to feel this hunger for perfection in yourself as a human 
need to keep up with the universe.  This is good.  It helps motivate you and 
move you forward.  It gives you an ideal to work towards and to hope for.

So you take another step. This is the human way of realizing these two 
phases of God’s creation and creativity.  Moments are not identical, yet you 
can think of the completeness of each moment as something like a dimension 
of reality they all have in common.  The perfection is the living change.  
This deliberately created-imperfect physical, mental, spiritual, and soulful 
universe is ever so certainly and majestically tending towards perfection.

So I congratulate you on feeling that completeness, which in your experience 
was a kind of respite from and realization within your drive for perfection. 
  You had a little inkling how to enjoy both.  Does this ring true, My son?

Student:  Yes, it’s a good understanding I’ll be able to share with others 
from now on.  Very satisfying and stabilizing.  It appears an even more 
profound sense of gratitude and therefore worship.  I feel bond with my 
Thought Adjuster, very creative of an ongoing and living worship.  Thank 
You.

Nebadonia:  You are welcome.  Let’s hope together you have many more such 
realizations, especially when your ambition or impatience for perfection 
gets in your way.  Take that next step and feel complete in yourself.

Student:  Thank You.

Nebadonia:  Well, My children, I hope I have given you some inklings as to 
how open your future is, and how you can feel secure within this 
uncertainty.  Faith is another word for trust, and as I have encouraged you 
to just see a flower, trust what you see in other human beings in all this 
unfathomable depth of their being part of God’s creation.

It will help you to realize too, that God is so much more than your concepts 
of Him, for this can augment the trust you have in Him.  Whereas you may 
react with fear to your own concepts of what is to come, what will come will 
always be so much greater.  And in this humility of accepting your human 
state, even while you are alive you become faith sons and daughters of God.  
You can find a freedom in this joyous acceptance, this humility of knowing 
reality is so much more than you can ever imagine or dream since there is no 
end to the surprise that is potential within it.  Feel My love surround you 
and support you.   Good evening.