DATE: February 12, 2006
LOCATION: Rio Rancho, NM, USA
T/R: Gerdean

Elena on Piano: "Sleepers Awake" by Bach

TEACHERS: TOMAS AND MERIUM
Commemorating 13 years with Tomas
Stories/lessons we learned from our youth
Appreciating the perspective of experience
Enjoying our cosmic childhood with others
Canossian admonitions and sneak previews

TOMAS: Good afternoon, my friends. This is Tomas.
Group: Tomas! Welcome!

TOMAS: . Tomas the Opportunist. I will take the opportunity, now that you are all assembled together, to acknowledge my appreciation for the opportunity to serve in this Teacher Corps. This week marks my 13th calendar year, by your calendar, of active participation in your upliftingment.

I am glad to see you have been getting on so well with my younger sister Merium who has been like a niece to me for many years . a younger sister indeed . and her messages to you, while not on the same plane as mine, inasmuch as we have two entirely different styles, I am assured she serves in her capacity and gets the teachings across in her own inimitable way.

It is all anyone can ask of one who has something to give, is that they give it with gusto. And the gusto, of course, is a gift of the spirit. In the alternative, there is bluster, and while we have both, as evolving beings, we ought to know the difference between them so as to appreciate them for what they are.

A teacher teaches. It is a compulsion for those of you who have anything akin to gratitude, to want to give back what you have received. Those of you who feel you have received much, may feel compelled to give more or make a more visible showing of what you would give, for this is your interpretation of personal expression, be it bluster or gusto.

It is so good to see you "in person" as it were. I am glad to see you all looking so well and adapting to life's changes so graciously. You are of a caliber to provide a wonderful expression of and for teaching, if for no other reason than because of your experience, and anyone who has lived as long as you have lived, has certainly something to say for the years.

But even as you are learning to be teachers, by the way you express who you are, and what you have to offer, my counterpart, your babysitter, has another means of delivery altogether. She opts to see you as children. And in this way, you can learn to play and enjoy yourselves as a break from being experientially responsible. It is a good idea, those of you who give it all you've got, to let things slide sometimes so that you can see things in the perspective of a child that knows that even when things may not appear to be going right, that is your limited perspective and not the all-seeing, all-knowing perspective of those who are so much older and wiser. And so balances comes, as you respect your experiential wisdom and appreciate your childish ways, your childlike faith.

I will visit again, and I'll see you later. Farewell.

Group: Thanks for coming, Tomas! Happy Valentine's Day.

Merium: All right, children, this is Merium, and I will first fluff up the pillows for immediately Uncle Tomas' stodgy ways have gotten in the way of your toes curling properly.

Elena: We brought a few balloons, too.

Merium: Yes, I enjoy the balloons. Nice touch. I'm quite the party animal. Not the same kind of party animal as Lester, but party animal nonetheless. Just as Tomas was talking about there being different kinds of teachers, there are different ways of having fun. And this afternoon I'd like to talk a bit about how it is that we have fun, but before I go there, I would like to exercise you all in a game of show and tell, that being, show us a picture from your experience that tells us something that we can incorporate into a value lesson, for this is what I do as a babysitter, and what Tomas does as a teacher, and what you may do as a mentor for humanity, by your telling of parabolic sagas of the life and teachings of yourself.

What I would like to do is ask you to go back into your memory bank as a young person, find for me an experience that you had that you felt was the nth degree of reality, only to find out through more time that that was but one episode in a long series of experiential learnings that ultimately allowed you a glimpse of wisdom. But without analyzing it to death, as I just did.

Renault: Do you mean, if we had a premonition, or a dream and it came true?
MERIUM: No.
Renault: Be a little more.

MERIUM: I will give you an example that would be of my nature as an 18-year-old girl, which is young enough, I suppose, to consider that we all shared - that being that at 18 I thought I had learned it all. I thought I knew as much as there was to know, and that was certainly infinitely more than the many children in the neighborhood that I watched after. Many of them were filled with questions. They were a continual question mark, as happens in a certain age, and I was able to answer their questions glibly and creatively, whether accurate or not, and they believed every word I said. I thus felt rather empowered. I came to found out I was not that invincible or powerful, for I still had many things I did not know.

That's the idea. Did you have any such experience as a child that you learned . as you mastered one level, that you learned later, again? [Silence]

I know my lovely Paula had such an experience for she has told it to us, when she thought she would take up smoking, and how impressed she was with her Daddy who allowed her to learn the lesson herself, and thus she did learn that in order to capture the attention of a gentleman she liked, and his admiration, she would do well to forego the earlier indulgence for later, better gain. So she learned. This is what I'm looking for. Learning experiences from your youth. [No response]

Did none of you learn anything as a child!?!?!

Paula: Heaven's yes!

Elena: I have something that comes to mind. It's not necessarily the child, but it's a thing I've had several experiences with, but the example that came to my mind was in my college years. Everything was going really great. I was operating at absolutely maximum and optimum, and then right in the middle of that, wham! Deborah was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, and that just brought everything to an absolutely, screeching halt. Just totally, reality shattered. Then things went on.

And there have been several other things that happened at subsequent times. But I didn't learn it then. I mean, I had the experience and it was really awful, but it took other experiences, multiple times, to actually learn from it something. I can go back and have examples from my childhood that were maybe the same thing, because I didn't learn at that point. I seem to need to be hit between the eyes with something significant multiple times before it gets to me.

So what I derive from that is that you can go through some really bad experiences. or ones that you feel are at the time, but again, it's just a sequence into something else at a later point, and it goes on, and it's not necessarily the shattering, screeching halt kind of situation.

MERIUM: Well said. Good story. A good contribution, yes. Thank you.

Men-O-Pah: When I was just a young boy, I had just learned to swim, and we swam in a huge big creek that the hole had been made by this stream running under this large culvert, and a railroad laying on top of that bridge, and we walked down there. It was a couple of miles from my home, and my grandmother, "Yeah, you can go down there and swim, but I don't want you hopping the local freight train when it comes up the hill so you can ride back to town." Okay. But, of course, we did just exactly that.

I'd get off the - this was a large hill and the trains really struggled to get over that hill. That was back in the days of the old steam trains, and in fact they kept two spare engines down at the bottom of that hill to - if they had a big load to go over, they had two spare engines down there that they kept warm all the time, to throw those trains over. So the train was just going three or four miles an hour and it was easy to get on the flat car and just sit down and drive up the hill. But I always got off of that thing early and walked the rest of the way to get to town.

But my grandmother's sister ran a hotel. It was just a big ol', big ol' house, but I remember there was 15 rooms in that house, and she catered to the railroad men. They stayed overnight there and then go on their way the next day, and it just so happens she saw me get off the train. She told my grandmother, of course, and my grandmother asked me. She said, "You been riding that train back up to town?" "Oh, no." Well, she said, "I know that you have because your Aunt saw you get off." And in the corner of the room there was a bundle of canes that we used to stake up the beans and she broke every one of them on me. And, you know, it didn't really hurt me. The beating didn't really hurt me. What really hurt me . she caught me lying. I have had a strong prohibition towards lying ever since then.

I had this lawyer friend who said, "If you must lie, do it convincingly," but I know it sounded better just to tell the truth because the truth will come out anyway. We think sometimes it won't, but it will. It will. I believe that.

MERIUM: A wonderful value lesson, indeed, and one which didn't take too many times to learn. But that's the way it is when a life lesson is well fixed through a memorable event, even though many times character is forged over time by repeated yet undramatic ways, such that over time the lesson is learned.

Esmeralda: You know, Elena mentioning a story, and the one Men-O-Pah told and the one you told about when you were 19, Merium--

But before I tell you this one, my other daughter, Deborah, whose spiritual name is Miriam -- the same as yours, Merium -- said she had just finished reading your lesson from our last get-together and thought it was absolutely wonderful. She said she was going to keep it on her nightstand and read it frequently, it was such a wonderful lesson

She and her husband are going through kind of a traumatic thing right now. Chelsea, their cat, who I believe is about 15 or so years old, recently had surgery to remove a cancerous tumor from her forehead, or from the front part of her head, and . it's likely she might recover from it and still live a long time, but then they may . they have to face losing her, too. But she wanted me to tell you that your lesson from our last get-together was simply wonderful. She's a member of Abraham and Mary Magdalene's group, the Woods Cross group.

But now, my experience . and Dorenda has already heard this, but . I was 18, as you mentioned, or maybe 19, somewhere between 18 and 19, and I had begun to smoke, but I had moved back home. I had lived away from home for about a year, but I moved back, but I still kept on smoking and Daddy let me use the family car since I didn't have one, and I would go meet a girlfriend or something and we would smoke in the car. And so, after awhile, Daddy one day just out of the blue said, "Mary Jo, I'm glad for you to use that car but I don't want you to let your friends drive the car. Just you. That's fine, but nobody else, because of the liability." And I said, "Why, Daddy, i wouldn't let anybody drive your car but me. There's no way," and he said, "Well, I just wondered because whoever's been driving the car has been smoking so I guess it was you." (Group laughter)

So I thought he was very clever the way he handled that. But I also heard that you don't really fool your parents, and I suppose that . well, I know, that we can apply that to our Father in Paradise. I am sure there is no way that we can fool him. So that was a good lesson to learn.

MERIUM: Wonderful story and pertinent point, dear, yes. Well done.

Paula: You know, when you talked about smoking, I'll never forget. Of course I was always the shrimp. No matter where I went, I was always the smallest one, and I wanted so much in my teen years to look older and grown up, you know, so I belonged to this sorority and we'd get to the meeting and all the girls would quick get their cigarettes out and sit around smoking, you know, so I thought, "Well, that looks pretty good. I think I'll try it." So I had an allowance, because I wasn't working then. Dad would give me just so much and we didn't have very much money and I'd save up my money and I'd go and buy a pack of cigarettes so that I would look grown up and bigger, like the other ones. And I kept that up for a while and finally I decided it wasn't worth the money it cost.

I wasn't enjoying the cigarettes that much, and there was a big dance at school and so I was dancing with one of the boys on the football team and I was hoping I would impress him no end and finally he said to me, "I like dancing with you," and I thought, "Gee, I must be a pretty good dancer!" and he said, "Well, you know, most of the girls when I dance with them, they smell of cigarette smoke, and you smell of perfume, and I like that better," and I thought "Hot darn! That does it!" (Group chortles). "Forget those cigarettes. As long as that's what the boys like, they like perfume, so I took that."

And my father wondered how come all of a sudden I wasn't smoking any more and he didn't have to keep at me and tell me to quit, and I never did tell him what caused it. I just let him think I was being a real grown up. Funny how you learn things.

MERIUM: Are there any stories from Thoroah or Renault?
Renault: I can't think of any.

Thoroah: Well, I've told this one before, but at my age I can't remember if it was to this group or not, so I can tell it again. I had always been read the story of "The boy who cried wolf" and it was a nice story and I figured I knew what it meant and we spent a lot of time out at my grandparents' farm and I entertained myself out there. I was pretty much alone, sometimes with my sisters, but I remember one time my mom and my great grandma were doing something in the house and I was in the yard and, anyway, I came running up the yard and I was either crying real loud (and I was faking it) or else I was yelling "help" - something that sounded like it was an emergency -- and both of those women showed up with the look on their face caring about my safety and I had horrified them.

Scared the heck out of them! And I was playing a game. Ah! Now I knew what they meant by crying wolf. I mean, I learned about it in a way . about how false alarms can affect people who care, and that if you keep 'false alarming' people, pretty soon people will probably stop caring because, you know, you aren't being honest with them that way, and I learned so many things about the principle of that. It's very vivid in my mind.

Esmeralda: You were very imaginative, to have read the story and then decided to try it.
Elena: It was a good story.
Esmeralda: It was a good story.

MERIUM: And a good value lesson. Why worry people needlessly. And I know Gerdean has something to relate.

Gerdean: I was thinking about . I think I must have been 15 when I had my first serious crush on a boy and I thought, this was it! This is love! This will be forever! And then I fell in love again, perhaps at 16, and there was nothing like this . ever before . nor ever would there be since .and this was the star that I would follow. And when I was 24. (Group laughter)

So eventually you come to recognize that every love relationship is special, but it's not the last end all be all of existence. Not to say that there is anything insignificant or common or ordinary about love, because each instance of love is a cameo performance and a memory of its own, but when you fall in love and "This is it; this is the true love" . well, I have had so many "true loves" I decided to just not bother with all that. Just love. That's the main thing.

And it took the Teachers some haranguing to get me to realize that, too, because I always wanted to take love captive, hang curtains on it, mold it, form it, dress it up, whatever, you know. And that doesn't mean I'm disinterested now in how my loved ones comport themselves, but it's not something I have to spend my life fretting about. So, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Group: That was a good story, too.

MERIUM: I liked it because I didn't ever get to experience a "crush," and while I don't feel sorry for myself, I find it fascinating. And that's my story. I'm sticking to it, too.

But the reason I wanted to talk about these instances to you is to bring to your mind that from the perspective of someone who is experienced in life, who has caliber, wisdom, understanding, who has some patience and some perspective, you can look at things as they were for you as a child and know that it had a way of working itself out, that what was brought to your attention and was so vital and memorable at the time was, perhaps, just a passing episode in the panorama of the whole picture.

I bring this to your attention to help you relax in your maturity and, even though I respect your sense of responsibility, they have not sent me in here to companion you for any reason other than that. To companion you, and this is what we are looking forward to in our pending party with the guests coming to the Canossian Spirituality Center in celebration of being - just to BE with each other.

I point out who you are in terms of the upcoming event because I encourage you to play, as I am encouraging you to allow your guests also to play. And when I say "play" I don't mean to encourage them and thus yourselves to be irresponsible or immature, but to allow yourselves the understanding that while you may think you have learned everything you need to learn, there are still many lessons ahead.

And that while you may think that something going on is a travesty or an affront to your values, it well may be just a passing phase, and so it does not behoove you, in the spirit of the gathering, to be overly officious as to how children of God conduct themselves, comport themselves, convey themselves when they are invited to come and BE themselves.

When you say, "come to my house and we'll play," certainly you have customs and conventions in your house that you abide by, but when you have company you know that the idea is to make them feel at home, and to allow them to have a good time in your good graces.

It would not do then to invite friends over to tell them you don't approve of how they think or how they worship or what they believe anymore than you would like it if you were to visit someone else's house and they told you that you were all wrong, all wet, or stupid.

This is something children do, yes, all the time, but as you are aware of how it leaks out in less than subtle ways, you will see by looking at yourself, as Thoroah looked at his concerned elders and see on their face, the realization of the truth of how we try to run the show and direct the play . not in a way so as to make your guests feel more at home, but rather to control the experience.

And my task this afternoon is to remind you that this is an experience that you will all enjoy because of the good graces of Our Parents whose party it is, and whose House we are all going to, in order to enjoy our childhood together with others in this grand family.

I almost feel as if someone should come in and fluff up the pillows! I feel I have spoken enough about how I see us comporting ourselves and "Let the good times roll!" What's going on with you in your lives that you want to tell us about?

Renault: Well, first of all, Merium, thank you for reminding us about our comportment. [Tape turned] Sometimes you feel irritated or . just little things, you know, when people all get together, so I think it helps to understand, "Be nice. Be welcoming. Act like a hostess." Because I feel comfortable and .

MERIUM: Well, you know, as you all told in your stories, you can see from this perspective that sooner or later it all works out, so what difference does it make how children are amusing themselves?

Renault: Um-hum.

MERIUM: I call this to Gerdean's attention in terms of her dis-ease about the "movement." She has reservations about the emphasis being placed on certain elements, such as Monjoronson as a name for the Magisterial Son, and as a skeptic of some of the transmissions being introduced into the TeaM community that discuss unrevealed types of life that are among you since she has long held a prejudice against anything living in the ethers but elves, fairies, spirits, gnomes and midwayers. Whatever else there are -- such as the Grays, Sordoms, and the like -- are not welcome in her consciousness.

Elena: I don't even know what the unrevealed types are!

MERIUM: They are part of the culture of the TeaM movement, of which she is an active participant. If you don't immerse yourself in the elements, you will not be apprised. It is not required that you concern yourself. Our concern, of course, is your personal relationship with your Indwelling Adjuster, your soul growth, but a side effect of this soul growth is the culture that develops around the practices and beliefs of the many who believe they are speaking with supernals and celestials, such as myself.

When no one can see us, it is speculated that we perhaps don't even exist, but are only a figment of the imagination of the T/R and the groups themselves are wrapped up in some kind of group hysteria, manifesting as a séance on certain afternoons or evenings throughout the country and not only is this part of the movement of the Teaching Mission but is a part and parcel of the New Age movement at large since there is quite a fashion these days to believe in celestials.

Look what we've started! "Conversations With God" is a prime example of how many millions of people are in support of the idea, and if you notice, the trend in publishing is that this practice of talking to the spirits is best seller material. We are hot stuff on the market!

And so there is a lot of focus and there are a lot of people who are as interested in this metaphysical arena as there are those interested in the political arena, and the peace movement; in fact, both those major areas of interest are often highly compatible, and so there are values that overlap.

This is all in preparation for future ages, but it is also true that the future age does not wait until tomorrow to begin; it began yesterday, and we are adding to the evolution of light and life on Urantia.

And this is all part of it! -- the many belief systems that are coming into the light, coming together, that are merging and conflicting as if a new symphony were coming into being, and while sometimes it sounds like all the instruments are a cacophony of noise, they are cueing up for the next composition by the Master Composer on high.

Renault: Isn't this because the circuits are now open? All of this is coming in? We are receiving all this? There's more and more people "talking to celestials" etc.

MERIUM: Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. And let me add that this, in some regards, is a decision you make, and in some regards it will happen whether or not you will participate. In other words, Is Your Channel Open? Is your circuit open? Are you plugged into the universe? Are you receiving cosmic communications? Or are you listening to the radio and hearing what other people hear? And/or ultimately, have you just turned the radio off and said, "I'm not interested." All of these are choices.

These movements are loosely working together, even though they sometimes seem to be far apart in their manifestation -- ideology, beliefs, and all of that. Whether they are called Star Seeds, Children of the Light, Sons and Daughters of the Living God, Light Workers, God's Kids, energy fields, cosmic personalities, whatever. It's all the same thing. And this is my advice to Gerdean who is on one hand thoroughly enchanted by such creatures as the supposed Sordoms, the other part of her mind is appalled and outraged that they are coming in as if to steal the show from those who have been doing it well -- "so far so good" -- so what do we need them for?

Well, it's just the same as all of us in this advancing army of consciousness, Gerdean. What do you need your personal teacher for? What do you need midwayers for? What do you need your seraphim for? What do you need angelic overseers for? Since you have the Divine Indweller? That should suffice you.

That is, I realize, the bottom line for many people. But for those of us who are consciously stepping out into speculation and possibilities of greater cosmic consciousness and galactic awareness, not limited to the physical universe, but the spiritual universe as well . we say, "Open up the windows and let the fresh air float through the stodgy minds of yesteryear."

Just as your childish illusions from your childhood have shown, over time, the real truth will prevail; that which is a lie will be exposed and truth may as well be the order of the day. Character will unfold and be revealed as genuine and more satisfying than affectation or illusion, and so eventually character will win out and we will all benefit as you realize that as you adore one person, you can also adore many others.

There is no limit on affection in this universe. There is no limit upon creative possibilities or expressions of divine reality. There are millions, billions or personalities in the universe. How can we attempt -- how can we even think about limiting the program that the gods designed because, perhaps, they don't fit on our dance card or suit our paradigm of reality.

Now is the time to become childlike and play with your fellows as children in the sandbox of time, taking comfort in your childlikeness together, playing like good kids and working out your differences without throwing sand in each other's face. And also like children can become irritable one moment, they are lovey-dovey the next. Give yourself the option to adapt and adjust as readily as do little ones, living in the now and loving the experience of living now and with one another.

I am talking too much, but I wanted to get in a few comments before the Retreat occurs:

Onomonolonton, who, perhaps you will recognize from the Urantia Book as being one of the 24 Councilors on the panel of Jerusem, who was once a religious leader of the red man of some stature, will be assisting our festivities in a prayer circle that will take place Thursday on the agenda of pre-retreat spiritual focus, so those of you who come, if you know in advance, we'll be having a prayer circle, may bring your prayerful attitudes.

TOMAS: Friday evening, my new adopted host and hostess, Randy and Leoma Sparer, will be talking about how we operate in Andover. They will share with you about the merkaba and other teaching techniques we have been delving into in the land of lakes.

MERIUM: The point is we have players at the party. We will focus on peace. There will be lots of show and tell. Saturday night we have the musical agenda brought to you by Dorenda and her friend -- What is your friend's name?

Dorenda: Nancy Kolence.
MERIUM: -- who is a vocalist?
Dorenda: Yes.
MERIUM: And so you will be doing a program of what?

Dorenda: Well, it's kind of . I don't know exactly the title for it. It's kind of 20's through 40's music. Ballads.

MERIUM: Classics. Standards.
Dorenda: Yeah. Early 1900 music. These are from the--
MERIUM: Some memory lane.
Dorenda: Yeah.
MERIUM: And beyond! Wonderful. There is a lot of heart in that music, a lot of soul.

Dorenda: We'll also be doing "Name that Tune" kind of stuff on that and I've gotten a few little prizes to get and I'm going to get other people to bring stuff, too, to kind of make it a little bit more interactive and fun.

MERIUM: So we have games!
Dorenda: Um-hum.

MERIUM: Fun and games afoot. Other speakers, other visitors, other dimensions, other realities. We will have fun. And don't exclude us from your agenda! We like to interact with you regularly, not to curtail your actions but to participate in them with you. We like parties, too, you know, and when you come across into the mansion world existence, you will enjoy some of the entertainment we enjoy here, to prove to you, to underscore the comment that we do like to have a good time.

I know you, too, like to have a good time, so I will get off my soapbox here. I appreciate your help, Gerdean, in setting forth some of the academics of the event, for there are those who will say 'it is a transcription by Gerdean organizing the party' and I therefore want to take responsibility for the fact that I, Merium, transmitted that stuff and Gerdean is simply my loyal mouthpiece. Such a life on such a planet! It is not possible to let someone get away with anything for fairness is such an issue, particularly for children. So, has everyone gotten their cookie?

Group: (Chortles) Yes.
MERIUM: Is everybody happy?
Group: Um-hum. Everybody's happy.

MERIUM: I am, too. I am made happier by your company. I look forward to seeing you at the party and at our next gathering afterward, so that we can have this experience together as a bonding exercise in community living.

Is there anyone who feels prompted to gather us together in a prayerful attitude as we close our session for the day?

Esmeralda: Father, we are thankful today that Tomas dropped in to visit with us because we knew he had not forgotten us and we certainly have not forgotten him. Thank you for his being here. Thank you also for Merium and the lessons that she brings us and her good cheer and her wisdom and her partaking of the responsibility of helping us to learn more. We do thank you for her.

We thank you for all the members of our group and for the affection and caring about each other that we share. Be with us, Father, until we meet again . which will be soon. Amen.

Group: Amen.