S.E. Idaho TeaM
4-15-03

Klarixiska(Bill): This is Klarixiska.  Let us pray.

Gracious Mother and Father, in one Divine unity, in one Parent combined, we
thank You for the gift of life, for physical growth and the joy of free
will choice.  May the spontaneity which characterizes this little one,
Abby, free up our hearts to accept change/growth without guilt for the
scaffolding which was necessary to achieve our current level of spiritual
progress.  May all of us open the doors of our hearts so that the wind of
the Spirit can blow freely, taking away the chaff and leaving the grain of
Truth which shall sustain our souls in this life and in the life to come.
Amen.

Talacia(Bill):  Greetings, friends.  I am a visiting Finaliter of
agondonter status.  My name, as close as it can be expressed, is Talacia.
I am a student/teacher in attendance upon Urantia.  I am here to study your
cultures, for they are very different than my mortal sphere of origin.  I
am also in consultation with your planetary administration with the wealth
of experience which has been mine for eons.  It was suggested that the
Teaching Mission participants would provide much valuable information to me
in my understanding of the difficulties which are unique to your sphere.  I
do not come tonight as a guest speaker.  But it was suggested by Minearisa
that I should make my presence known inasmuch as you all have been
appraised of your agondonter status and the implications of what that may
mean. 


We agondonters are not in the mind set of "chosen people".  We are not
"special" in any prideful sense of the word.  But our struggle with doubt,
discouragement, depression, fear, all of these things that you know well,
has resulted in the rewards of skill, the skill that comes from great
decision making in adverse circumstances requiring just the trust of the
heart in the goodness and reality of the divine presence of God.  In
addition to not being in a status conscious attitude of "choseness" we need
you to know that you are not in any sense isolated by your status as
agondonters.  In fact, our experience gives us more than ample opportunity
to be the gadflies of the universe, that is, we are envied by many because
of our opportunities to be where, as you would say, the action is.  Perhaps
gadflies was a poor word...

Ken: I thought it was pretty good!

Talacia:...but I intended to give you a sense of adventure, of joy, in your
future doings as agondonters. 

The Gods are incredibly fair and there is no favoritism at all in the
widespread universe of universes.  Some are potential Finaliters, such as
yourselves, because you are of origin on a Father fusion planet.  Others
are limited to the Local Universe in their service during this universe
age.  Still others are limited to the Superuniverses.  These differences
are not status differences, just as agondonter status is really not a
specialness category.  They are all due to one's history of experience.  In
order for the universe to function properly there must be expertise at
every level.  We do not know how all this may change in the next universe
age.  We really only speculate with various degrees of confidence.  But we
are sure that the goodness that we know of God the Trinity, and God the
Supreme must persist forever.  Therefore, we are confident that we have
only begun to taste of the flavor of divinity in a most partial manner, and
that great and rewarding enhancements of divine banquets shall be our lot
in the future and into eternity. 

My friends, this mortal life is so short.  When you have passed through the
door of death you will realize the immensity of the words "eternal life".
Nevertheless, brief as this life is, it is immensely important and it is
one of accountability. 

Well, I did not intend to give a lesson but a few perspectives.  I have
just now been told that I may take the position of a "lecturer in
residence" specific to the topic of agondonter realities.  This was not my
intention, but your staff thinks that it should be a opportunity that you
might wish to take advantage of.  Therefore, I will open this floor to
questions specific to the subject of an agondonter.  If you have questions
I will attempt to answer them.

LaReen: Welcome!  I look at it...when you said gadflies, I related to that.
 I've been called that all my life!  I don't feel like we are special
because we are agondonters.  To me, it feels more like it is a good thing
on our resume.  Is that correct?  Am I even close?

Talacia: Oh, yes!  Very well put, my dear.  Certainly it is a good thing on
your resume!  But you don't understand yet what a large thing it is on your
resume!  I really don't need to enlarge on that issue.  I was concerned
that you might get the impression from the fact that we are housed together
in the Local Universe career and also that we are very intimately
associated in all but the Havona circuits, that we might experience some
degree of isolation as esprit de corps results in special groups on your
planet.  A comment was made relative to the idea that we might be similar
to the "special forces" of your military.  I understand the analogy, but I
flinch at the irregularity between our tasks.  We are far from being agents
of sabotage, intrigue, and violence.  Our job is to teach those who have
experienced the same difficult circumstances that we had; how best to
enlarge their faith and sustain their courage.  So, yes, it is a plus on
your resume.  It is also a major part of it.  Does this satisfy you?

LaReen: Yes, thank you very much.

Ken: If I understood you right, you said you were of Finaliter status?

Talacia: Yes.

Ken: Does that mean you have traversed Havona?

Talacia: That is correct. 

Ken: And you also came from a planet of rebellion?

Talacia: That is correct.

Ken: Do you find our situation here similar to what you experienced, that
we are experiencing fear, doubt, anger, all these spirit poisons?  Do you
find them the same as you did, when you were living your mortal life?

Talacia: A very good question, my friend.  The circumstances of my planet
were different, but the emotional reactions were the same.  We, also,
bemoaned our legacy of rebellion.  We, also, complained of our lack of
visible leadership, similar to yours.  We, also, experienced the inevitable
evolutionary legacy of brutality, war, and famine.  On our planet, as I
believe it is on yours, there was great envy and jealousy toward those who
were more intelligent by those who were less intelligent.  They trampled
upon idealism.  They laughed to scorn those who tried to lift higher
principles to a place of esteem.  They literally killed the leaders of
spiritual advancement.  Yes, I guess we would have to agree that much of
the experience on my planet is similar to yours although the circumstances
and details are not the same.  Human beings are all the same, their
differences being whether you are one brained, two brained, or three
brained species.  We were a two brained species, like you are.  We were
also a planet with water and air.  But, you see, we are all the same in our
spiritual endowment.  We all have within us a Fragment of the First Source
and Center, whether that Fragment shall be a fusion candidate or merely a
planetary helper.  Once we have completed the mortal life, then our
spiritual equality is much more evident.  Have I answered your question?

Ken: Yes, you have.  Thank you very much.  You mentioned that your planet
was in a state of rebellion.  Was it in default, similar to ours.  Was it a
Planetary Prince or was it....

Talacia: It was in one of the previous rebellions in Nebadon and we lost
our Planetary Prince and we lost our Material Son and Daughter, as well.

Ken: Then, we have very much in common, my friend.

Talacia: Yes, except that your planet, Urantia, is the only one in Nebadon
to have Michael as your Bestowal Son.  Of course, this fact is a great
magnetic attraction.  This is not to say that the Avonal Sons who come to
all other planets in bestowal missions do a poor job.  They do an excellent
job, every bit as good as the Creator Son.  Still, it is such a unique
experience to be the one planet in ten million who are host to the Creator
Son. 

I would say in conclusion to your question that despite the fact that
Michael came here, I would have to rate your planet as more distressed than
mine was.  I don't know if this makes you feel bad (group chuckles and
comments, "Gee, thanks") or feel better.  But Michael did not lightly
choose to come here.  Again, your text tells you that you are about average
in depravity among the rebellion planets; some are worse, and some are
better.  That is a reference to the Luciferian rebellion.  Mine was a
different rebellion.

Well, any questions about anything else I have spoken of?  I will tell you
right now that if you are going to ask me what it is like to be a morontia
being in an agondonter colony ... that is something that I will not answer.
 It simply is inexplicable at this point.

Virginia: Talacia, could you explain or talk about the decisions that you
made as a mortal that were more important, more uplifting than others that
you made?

Talacia: Are you asking me to describe what kind of decisions that I made
that were the most important for my spiritual progress? 

Virginia: Yes!

Talacia: Very well.  That is a very important question.  Now you will get a
lesson!  (Laughter)

LaReen: Ha ha ha!

Virginia: I need one!

Talacia: First of all, we were not without spiritual direction, even as you
have not been without spiritual direction.  In other words, we were not in
total darkness with no knowledge about God and how the universe runs.  It
was taught that faith was necessary for salvation, for eternal life.  The
revelation that we had received was laid out in progressive layers and over
time, containing much spiritual truth.  Therefore, just as is true on this
world, a choice could be made between faith, based on revelation, or
choosing doubt, based on human reason and lack of evidence.  In other
words, we struggled with faith and doubt.  Faith is always the same
experience anywhere in the universe.  It is essentially a trust in the
goodness and the overcare of God.  So this was one area of important
decisions, making faith commitments and in the process of those
commitments, yielding to spiritual growth.  Sounds familiar.  Correct?

Because we had an idea of what spiritual growth entailed, we, like you,
were aware of our failures.  We tended to criticize ourselves excessively.
We tended to feel guilty about feeling guilty. (Chuckling in the
background) We tended to be critical of ourselves for being critical of
ourselves!  And we even thought, deep down at times, there was something
wrong with us that had resulted in the rebellion and default of our
spiritual planetary government.   So another great struggle was to believe
that our sonship and daughtership, which we had teaching about, was really
true. 

Although I could go on and on, I would say that those were the two biggies,
to learn to trust in the loving overcare of God, and ,therefor, believe the
good words, that rather than being children of evil, we were sons and
daughters of this loving God; and that the mistakes that we had made were
part of the process of growth.
You see, the urge for perfection within us, which is our Thought Adjuster's
work, can be distorted by our own minds when we look at ourselves in an
idealistic mode and compare our current status with our ideals;
then a person can conclude that they are somehow unworthy of Father's love,
of Mother's care, of our Bestowal Son's mission.

Okay!  I have one more area.  Our service to each other was tainted by our
low self esteem, those struggles that I just referred to.  We had a great
need to be congratulated, to be patted on the back, to be told, "thank you"
for the things we did for other people.  You can see how that would follow,
for if one is not feeling worthy they are looking for feedback that will
somehow change that conception of unworthiness into one of value.  So, we
looked for that from other people.  The struggle to achieve true self
esteem, true self respect was one of our great areas of achievement. 

I am so impressed with your Teaching Mission agenda that Machiventa and his
teachers have given you!  They are addressing the key core problem of every
Urantian.  They don't know who they really are.  You, good students that
you are, are beginning to comprehend it!...that you truly are God's
children and that is the source of your value.  You are His precious sons
and daughters!  From that sense of value you can then serve other people
without the need for the ego satisfaction of compliments; and in that
service you, and we are all enhancing the supremacy of God the Supreme,
enhancing the evolution of the syntheses of the power and personality
unification of the Supreme Being.  Have I given you some thoughts here, my
dear?

Virginia: Yes, you have, Talacia.  I think self esteem probably is the
issue for most of us as Urantians that have been taught that we are part of
the fallen ones, original sin rather than original blessing.  I can't help
but mention Mother Theresa and what she said.  She said she did not react
to praise or criticism.  Of course, this was true of Jesus, also.  To be in
that position, I suppose, would be the place where God's love is all
sufficient.

Talacia: Yes, indeed!  Self esteem does not come about as a result of
reciting mantras.  (Student: hmm.)  It comes about as a result of doing the
will of God.  And what is the will of God?  To share your inner life with
Him/Her, that you trust, that you open up, that you dare to believe that
you are this lovely potential Finaliter that God sees you as, right now.
For with God there is no linear sense of time. 

But how can you have self esteem when you are labeled as fallen sons of
Adam, and fallen daughters, as well?  Yes, this is an enormous problem for
Christians. Yet, not all of your cultures buy this pessimistic appraisal.
Nevertheless, as I said a moment ago, I am very impressed with your
teachers' agenda as they are addressing the major problem. 

Don't make the mistake that some of us made.  Don't ever say to yourselves
that you deserved to have a planetary rebellion and an Adamic default
because you are such crummy people.  Don't ever say that.  You deserve your
status as God's precious children and to know that the purpose of life is
to serve yourself and others with overflowing joy, with selflessness,
taking pleasure in the actual acts of service, rather than the compliments
or the thank you's.

Well, I didn't intend to be the main speaker tonight, but now I have heard
that I have taken up all of our time.  I must say "thank you" for your
attention.  It's been a real pleasure to meet with you people.  Have no
more worries (if you had any) about being agondonters, and stop complaining
about how hard life is because you are blessed beyond measure!

Group: You are taking away our excuses!  (Laughter)

Talacia: My love to you.  Someday we shall see each other in the Spirit.
Good evening.

Group: Good evening.  Thank you.